Worldwide, a lot of us are going through a challenging time and that can make it seem harder to go with the flow.
It’s tough to be your best when faced with lockdowns, travel restrictions, quarantine requirements, and so much more. It is as if in a blink of an eye our entire lifestyle has changed.
We are all struggling. We are upset, off balance and charting into new territory. But if we don’t watch it, the habit of being in the upset will actually change our mindset. We have to figure out and strategize how to overcome these hard times and be able to go with the flow.
Allow Yourself to Feel the Sadness
Not every day is going to be rainbows and sunshine. Life doesn’t work that way. But that doesn’t mean that we have to get stuck on all the negativity. I’m not saying that denying how we feel is the answer. Instead, when we allow ourselves to feel the sadness, to feel angry or upset, or just frustrated it helps us move past those feelings.
We’re human beings who have feelings and emotions. Denying how we feel only makes us feel that way longer. How long do we want to spend in those emotions? How long do we want to spend in sadness? We can have that moment to admit how we are feeling, to feel it, to go through it, and then move along. This is what going with the flow really means.
A client was angry and frustrated about the rules and regulations regarding the lockdowns and travel restrictions. When she realized that if she would take the time to allow her feeling, and to really feel it and go through it, even if that took a couple of hours or an entire day, she was finally able to have a good night’s sleep. Then the next day, she woke up energized and full of creativity and inspiration. That helped her realize the importance of going with the flow, even though she’s had to completely rearrange her life and schedule.
Talk About It
What’s interesting, not only with that client but with many people, is that it helps us to release our emotions when we talk to someone, we trust about how we feel. Whether it’s a loved one or a mentor or a coach, by saying out loud how we feel, it helps us process our emotions. Sometimes, all we need is to be able to say, “Gosh, I’m really upset and frustrated about this”.
It’s not about them solving our problem, it’s about being able to share how we feel. If you’re constantly looking to just ‘get over it’ really quick or find a solution, we’re actually skipping over the feeling aspect of being human. When we do that, we’re not learning that feelings and emotions are what being a human is all about.
We all have different feelings and emotions on the spectrum.
What’s important is how we deal with them. How we learn to master our emotions and not get carried away with our frustrations, anger, or anything else that we are feeling. How do we learn to integrate them and embody them and use them for our learning purposes? How can we use our emotional experiences to better ourselves and our lives in the way that we want rather than letting our emotions be a destructive force in our lives?
Grow Through What You Go Through
When we don’t take the time to process our emotions in a positive way and go with the flow, we can hold ourselves back from growth and progress. We get distracted, we lose a lot of time, we aren’t able to focus on what we do want. It seeps into every aspect of our lives.
A couple of years ago, a client was steeped in anger and frustration. He lost so much time being angry and interacting with everybody in his life from a place of anger that he almost single handedly destroyed his business and relationships. Thankfully, he was able to realize how holding on to his anger was destroying everything he loved and rectify it in time.
How many people can you think of that have completely destroyed their lives in some way because they couldn’t let go of something and just go with the flow? How many people do you know that if they would just feel the emotions that came up, take the lessons that came with it and grow from it would have been better off?
Learn From Your Experiences
Sometimes, there are things that happen in our lives that are devastating. We lose people, we lose our business. We go bankrupt. We lose our best friend or have an argument with a loved one. Whatever it is, these are things that happen. Aside from the emotion, whenever we get caught up in an argument or are going through a difficult time, stand outside of that and ask “What can I learn from this?”.
Sometimes, when we take the time to step outside of the situation at hand, we realize that the best thing to do is apologize and move on. Other times, we may see that the other person in the situation needs kindness and compassion. It’s okay to honor ourselves and feel the anger, sadness, or frustration while still moving through it instead of wasting days or weeks (or years) wallowing in our feelings.
In our society, we are taught to ‘get over it’, especially the heavier emotions of anger and sadness. We have learned to deal with it and move on. That’s why some people get uncomfortable when we talk about sadness or anger. We aren’t taught how to utilize and work with our emotions for our benefit.
Go With the Flow
If we learn to master our emotions, it helps us create the lives we want to have and to be more conscious about what we’re doing. To go with the flow means being aware of what we can learn from our experiences. It helps us see how these experiences are serving us. We get the opportunity to learn with every single experience that we have and it’s all serving a purpose.
It’s fascinating that whenever you change your perspective on difficult situations and challenges in life, amazing things will start to open up. It will leave you feeling more grateful. You will have a renewed sense of vitality and more energy to enthusiastically go with the flow and learn as you grow. Instead of losing energy and wasting time on the less than enjoyable emotions, it’s easier to move through them and realize it’s all part of the process.
Is go with the flow good?
Yes, going with the flow is incredibly important. Think about life as a flowing river, you can either swim against the current, or you can go with the flow.
Focusing on our emotions and learning how they affect us can have a huge impact in our lives. Anger and frustration have driven people to act out in self-destructive ways. It’s easy to get caught up in focusing on these feelings, but when we take the time to step back, we realize that there are lessons to be learned from such experiences. It is more beneficial for us if we learn the lesson instead of focusing on the anger and ignoring everything else.
There are many people out there who have destroyed their lives by getting caught up in anger and sadness without letting go of it. We don’t always know what is affecting someones mood, but it is important for us to be aware of those around us as well as ourselves. When we have negative emotions, it can affect those around us in very strong ways.
When we go through challenges and difficult times, it’s important to be able to focus on the lessons that are being taught. It is not always easy as we often prefer to just get over whatever has happened.
How do you relax and go with the flow in a relationship?
It can be difficult to focus on what you are doing when you are involved in a relationship. One of the important things that you need to do is relax and go with the flow. To do this, concentrate on the things that matter in your relationship. Spend less time trying to control things that you have no control over. Be open to new and exciting experiences. Let go of unnecessary stress and pressure within the relationship. You may also want to practice recognizing your irrational beliefs and replacing them with rational ones as they come up so that you don’t continue to procrastinate.
You can also go with the flow with a business relationship, and allow yourself to be guided by your clients. This will allow you to deliver exactly what they want, but may also cause problems down the line.
You should always know where you stand and what your limits are, as well as the limit of the client. Some clients can be difficult if you appear to disrespect their position, so it is very important to do your best to make them happy without sacrificing too much of yourself.
Dr. Asha Prasad
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